Dear D,
I have often come across a thought, a particular one in fact. With age, this thought is gradually turning into a realization. During my childhood, I was never confident about myself. As I grew up, I always knew in my heart that I was capable of doing certain things, but never had the courage to do them. I was not matured enough to understand my thought, the reason behind this lack.
That thought was SELF-BELIEF. I never believed myself enough to be capable of doing things I ever wanted to, never loved myself enough to have belief in my self-worth, never respected myself to receive that respect from others.
They say everything starts from us, within us, to perceive them in the real world. With time I have realized it, felt it, and now try my best to allow it. Innumerable questions hovered my mind ever since this illumination dawned on me. What is my purpose? What is the purpose of my living? What am I supposed to do? How should I start? In fact from where exactly? Will I be able to start all over again?
As I was struggling with these dilemmas, I decided to start from the start. To begin from where I left. When people should be quite comfortable with their lives and jobs, I am going through the initial teething problems. But I take it as a challenge, not a struggle, rather an opportunity, not a loss of time. And I am enjoying it to the full. At least now I know my worth, am capable of loving myself unconditionally, respect my values and integrity. I no longer listen to outside chaos, but my inner voices. I actually feel alive rather than being just living. Now I have a purpose to live for, a dream to fulfill, and roads to travel by. What more shall I ask for?
That's all for today. Now I must go and have my dinner.
"circling around the tree
in an aimless vision
I forgot to look up,
the sky was not far-
but I was busy
tending the grass..."
By Nandini Sengupta
@metaphors_of_life
Beautifully written
The weekly diary column is here! And this one is about self-growth, how we limit ourselves through our fears and insecurities—failing to achieve our full potential. What I love about these diary entries is the conversational tone which gives a personal touch to the writing. It's like listening to a friend, the reader assumes the place of the diary, and, in effect, that of a listener. This time, we got to hear about the importance of self belief and how it can take some time to finally get hold of the redeeming virtue. How it allows one to work towards the things one hopes for—aims, objectives, purpose—seeing them as a mere challenge instead of a struggle. The concluding poem summarizes…